I spent last month thinking about a 52 week project that I could do on this here blog. I've also had ECourses in the back of my mind. So, I decided to combine the two and am excited to present to you "How to Be a Fat Bitch"!
I will be sharing a lesson that you can use to work towards loving your fat body, living a fierce life and feeling confident. This ECourse is about fat acceptance, activism and fatshion. You can watch the vlog and read along and then you will be given an assignment and an opportunity to discuss it with me and other readers. You will also be prompted with some discussion questions. There will be room for all levels of body positive advocates to participate. This will be a chance to focus in on a specific aspect of fat acceptance and fatshion so that you can integrate it into your life and be a fat bitch too! Assignments don't have a due date and feel free to navigate at your own pace. This ECourse is free and can be done at any time! Click here to register.
A fat bitch is confident, out-spoken and proud of who she is. The word bitch has been used by feminists as a way to reclaim an insult used to demean our cause. Let's get started!
Hey fat bitches! Welcome to my new series "How to be a Fat Bitch". My first lesson is "You are not giving up." A crucial step to becoming a fat bitch is extinguishing the concept that you are giving up. I can't tell you how important this is. The outside world sees a fat person enjoying life and because of their prejudices they don't see that the person is fucking kicking ass, they see someone that has given up on life. Which is SO WRONG! The person I was when I was "trying". By trying I mean dieting, hating myself and treating my body like shit. That person was not happy. They were not strong, they didn't feel good. Once I realized that I can stop doing all that to myself without giving up, I was able to finally love and truly take care of my body how it needed to be taken care of.
Being fat positive is not just loving your fat, You need to be able to look at yourself as a good person. Fat is not a morality issue. That you haven't let go. It is the very opposite. I have actually had people tell me that I have given up and will die. I am like "Are you looking at me? You must be thinking of someone else!" It doesn't hurt my feelings but it really pisses me off. I just want to grab them and shake them and tell them that I am doing so awesome and that none of the crap they are saying is true and they can feel the same way about themselves. Being a fat activist isn't about condoning unhealthy behavior or promoting fatness. I am not trying to get the world fat. Well, maybe a little LOL! Seriously, I am not saying "well its easier for me to just stop working, be lazy and eat entire pizzas and 10 cupcakes". Actual quote, by the way. You don't understand. Before fat acceptance, that would have described me.
I don't need fat acceptance to feel better about myself or make excuses for myself. I need it to stay alive. Because fat people deal with discrimination, bullies and general bullshit on a daily basis because of how someone ELSE feels about our bodies. It is dangerous and we need a support system. We need a way to fight and be fabulous regardless. Regardless of how we are treated, not regardless of our bodies. We are told daily that we are a disease and a problem. I need to not feel that way. I need to be able to think independently and sort through all the junk science. I need to know about the studies that show that fat is not unhealthy and that dieting doesn't work. I need to be able to go work every day and feel good about myself in spite of having to report my weight to my employer so that can determine my value and how much I should pay in fat taxes. The only thing I have given up on is being a punching bag.
I keep coming back to this quote from Lesley Kinzel and don't be surprised if I repeat it through these courses. "The people who get angriest about fat girls looking good and feeling hot are the people who are the most strongly invested in the idea that a person has to be skinny in order to be happy, healthy, and loved." Don't put anymore of your money in that bank.
So don't let some asshole sigh, call you honey and tell you that you can really do it when you say you have stopped dieting. Don't let anyone shame you for being a "bad fatty." Everyone loves a good fatty that tries a million diets, insults herself at every turn and apologizes to every Tom, Dick and Harry for their existence and being seen. She is seen as the one that is trying. Listen world, fat bitches are trying. We are trying to not tear off your face.
Write down 5 things that you are going to do that make you happy. Not "even though you are fat" but because you are fat and awesome. 5 things that have nothing to do with trying for the sake of others. 5 things for yourself and your well being. Like "go out dancing and actually dance", "throw away my scale", "make something yummy and bring it to work to share", "join a yoga class" and "wear that tight leopard skirt". Blog it, Instagram it, Tweet it (#fatbitchecourse, #nearsightedowl), etc. and share it in the comments below. EXTRA CREDIT: Do some of them!
How do you deal with people that make assumptions about you based on being fat? Is the best revenge to live well and be happy? How do you feel about the concept of there being a "good fatty" and a "bad fatty" perceived in society?
Grab the button!
Show your support and sponsor, or make a donation. The ECourse will continue to be free but donations are appreciated to help keep this work going. Thank you!
- Rachele
109 ♥ COMMENTS ♥:
Wow, what a great idea Rachele! This sounds amazing, I will definitely be following along. I am amazed you find the time for such awesome stuff when you work full time and have a life outside of this blog. You are such an inspiration.
Rachele, you are incredible! Wow! I'm definitely going to be joining in with this!
Becky
xx
This is very interesting! Thank you. I wrote my assignment on my Tumblr. And here are my thoughts on this first discussion.
Discussion: "How do you deal with people that make assumptions about you based on being fat? Is the best revenge to live well and be happy? How do you feel about the concept of there being a 'good fatty' and a 'bad fatty' perceived in society?"
I've not been bullied directly about my weight, and I wasn't bullied by my parents growing up. I think that has helped me feel okay about myself in some ways. However I do know what a 'good' fatty vs. a 'bad' one means to me because I was not raised in a vacuum. For me, it means presenting myself as femme, wearing fashionable clothes, not showing my working-class status. These are all things I know in my heart of hearts are repressive for me.
I don't know what assumptions people make about me for my weight but I do know that when people make assumptions about others, I have no problem speaking up. People who do this are full of fear and that's why they say and do harmful things.
I was just going to say the same! Your productiveness is off the scale! (And very awesome, of course). This is brilliant.
Everyone should be happy with who they are. :)
Yay for week 1! I just did my blog post:
http://milkyrobot.blogspot.com/2013/02/how-to-be-fat-bitch-week-1.html
But here is my snip on the discussion end! Lately I have been getting the "you gave up?" comments and it is so frustrating. At least once a week I get several people asking me about how my weight loss is going, then when I tell them I quit Weight Watchers and chose to be happy and want to just love myself as is, I get the long pause and then here it comes.... "So you gave up?". There needs to be more fat positive and acceptance out there. I see a lot more of it being talked about (in a positive way) and I see it getting bigger this year for sure! The media has warped the brains so much into thinking "Thin + Weight Loss = Happiness" and it is SO not true. I have never felt more happier in my life, it's almost insane at how happy I am. I no longer wake up dreading the day and thinking about my fat, I now wake up happy and ready to take on the day!
I would like to thank you for all the awesomeness you blog about, you truly inspire me. I've been lucky to have supportive parents but people who I thought were my friends were very judge mental, saying I "cramped their style" because of my weight. I'm now lucky to have found friends who care for me and a man who loves me and my body. Reading your blog makes me smile.
Write down 5 things that you are going to do that make you happy. Not “even though you are fat” but because you are fat and awesome. 5 things that have nothing to do with trying for the sake of others. 5 things for yourself and your well being.
1- I’m going to shoot hoops at the court at my gym, even though I can’t play for shit.
2- I’m going to go out in public with S and not care if people stare or judge that he’s wicked skinny and I’m the awesome fat girl he loves.
3- I’m going to go dancing when my friends invite me and actually enjoy myself.
4- I’m going to learn Korean and not care when people continue to question why I want to.
5- I’m going to where more color and less black clothing.
oh hallelujah! I am excited by this post and finally figured out how to make comments on this here blog. I'm pretty happy about both of these things! Now, I can follow along with this ecourse and make comments. I'm kind of in the first stage of my own fat-acceptance and this ecourse is right on time for me! I actually spent time looking at my naked self in the mirror last night and watching myself dance, and move and I liked what I saw. I was like really studying myself for the first time. This is a HUGE deal for me. Thank you for inspiring me, Rachel!
I think I'm a little bit in love with you in a kind of platonic, 'she bloody rocks' way. I put up a tab on my blog last week called 'My Body' with a photo of myself in my every day, nothing special, mismatching underwear. I think I look pretty damn good in my underwear and really don't give two shits if people find me offensive whilst I'm daring to exist/having the temerity to be fat n' all ;) Needless to say, I'm jumping in on this with both feet.
Shared to the Fat and Not Afraid FB page with hopes my readers will join me and you and everyone else! I am a fat bitch and I love myself. Take that, haters!
~JeninCanada
Hey Rachele! I love what you're doing with this vlog series & ecourse! I'm planning on following along and wrote a blog post with the assignment! Can't wait to see what comes next week!
http://seekingthesimplicity.blogspot.ca/
Here's my discussion question too!
I don't pay all that much attention to people who have a problem with my body... Those who are preoccupied with me & my size are usually externalizing some issue with themselves. Besides, returning their hatred never solves anything... It just perpetuates the problem. I don't even think it's revenge to live well and happy... I think its my right & duty as a person.
Ahhhh! I don't know how bad I needed this until I saw it.
Homework:
1. I will not be afraid to go outside on my own. Because someone called me a "fat fuck"
2. I return to dying my hair super copper red. Because I love it!!!
3. I am going to stop wearing black!
4. I am going to start wearing make up again.
5. I am going to make something for myself. Because I deserve it!!!
Let's get cracking!!!!!!
Thank you Rachele!!!
I would like to do this course also. Is the video the same as what you have written because it isn't captioned? I don't expect you to caption it, that is much work. I will do my best to do the course!
Yes it is the same! You aren't missing anything in the video.
I will caption too. Some of the videos will have more going on and I want you to be able to participate too.
I agree! I think we don't owe anyone an explanation or proof that we are worthy. It is our right!
Who said I have a life ;) But really this means a lot to me. It is something I have always wanted to do and I am brimming with ideas.
Yesss!
Yes, there is such a pressure to be all done up and not look poor. Fuck that! Sometimes I just want to wear a holey shirt and have messy hair. I used to feel really uncomfortable on those rushed morning when all I have time for is a hat. But now it feels good to just get that extra few minutes of sleep and I still feel cute dressed down.
This is so great! I am already loving reading through the responses. I have my blog post scheduled for tomorrow (well, I'm working on it now!)
Your question really made me think because I know that my parents have commented on my weight & I really know it's from love BUT also from misunderstanding. My mother would always suggest I do this or that, or just walk more, or something. It wasn't until recently that I realized I was getting comments on my weight AND it wasn't until recently that I realized my body has changed a lot since high school. (I even had my gyno say something to me.....how awkward is that? It's already weird you're looking at my lady bits...) But when I realized my body changed, all of a sudden these insecurities creeped in. I was torn between loving my suddenly more curvier curves & thinking I had to change.
Also, whenever I'm having what I used to call a 'fat day' I'd think about if people were watching me eat. I remember being at a buffet & thinking 'I really wanna get some more ________' but was really afraid to get up. Did they see what was on my plate before? Are they talking about me?
It's been weird realizing these things about myself I guess I never really paid attention to. I knew I was fat but I also knew I was confident. I always got complimented on being confident but then my body changed just a little bit more & suddenly a few more lbs became a great big deal...to everyone! (what??)
I am so glad to have found a little community to get some inspiration from & am on my way to being a fat (& happy) bitch.
Here are my 5 things for the Assignment:
.1. Wear what I want when I want.
2. Dye y hair red.
3. Sew, craft and create.
4. Write more letters.
5. Cook dinner for my family, something that everyone will like and can eat.
And for the Discussion:
I have to say that no strangers have ever actually made any assumption about me and my weight to my face. Sometimes I think that people might be thinking something and not say it. This usually makes me feel self conscious at first. But I have been working on realizing that they are the ones with a problem, not me. When it comes to strangers I think the best revenge is to live well and be happy. You will probably never see that person again and it isn't worth provoking them when it doesn't really matter (especially if I am at work and it could escalate into a problem). When it comes to family and friends, I think education is the first step. And if they insist on being ignorant, then live well and be happy would be my next choice. This is the first time I have heard the "good fatty" and "bad fatty" concept put into so many words, but I think that it is very real and very ridiculous. "Good fattys" are the people who fuel the diet industry, but it isn't their fault because they have been inundated with that crap since birth. They need to know that there are other options. This whole concept that the fat people who have accepted themselves and begun to love themselves have "given up" pisses me off. There need to be more "bad fattys" in my opinion, here's hoping that some change can come from this course and more people can be brought into the "bad fattys" fold (see what I did there, ha!).
Great idea Rachele! Here's my first assignment:
Week 1s assignment is to write down 5 things I’m going to do to make myself happy.
1. Keep going to book club
2. Make another dress from my Colette sewing book.
3. Wear a lycra dress
4. Learn to do my hair in retro styles
5. Start writing creatively again.
Discussion topic:How do you deal with people that make assumptions about you based on being fat? Is the best revenge to live well and be happy? How do you feel about the concept of there being a “good fatty” and a “bad fatty” perceived in society?
One of the biggest things is about my fitness. One of the ways I manage my depression is through regular exercise, I also like to challenge myself so enjoy doing things that people don’t expect fat people to do. I do boxing classes, walk, go on tramps (hikes) with my dad and have walked 1/2 marathons. I’ve found people seem surprised when I discuss what I do, or give me a condescending ‘oh good on you’. I sometimes wonder if I confuse people by not engaging in diet talk - because you know fat people are meant to be dieting and at least trying to lose weight. I do think it is the best revenge to live well and be happy - this will come in different forms for people. For me the biggest revenge is by not dieting - by not buying into the ideology that as a fat woman I should be trying to change my body. The ‘good fatty’ vs. ‘bad fatty’ thing is interesting to me because I have fallen into that trap before I started my own journey into body acceptance and in the early days of exploring the fatsophere. It took me awhile to understand I wasn’t any better than another fat person because I am active and make different choices. I notice with my dad that I am somehow acceptable because of the fact I do a lot of exercise and have a reasonable level of fitness - this is ‘good’ even though I am technically obese (according to the BMI anyway). I also think that how fat a person is can affect the good vs. bad fatty - what I mean by this is it seems to be Ok to be a little fat but not morbidly obese. And I wonder if fat people who have slim faces and flatter stomachs are more accepted than other fat shapes.
Rachele! I love this idea, and I am so excited to be participating and working along through this! I already wrote a post about my five things, and I am so inspired by all the great ideas on here!
http://laceandmuskeg.blogspot.ca/2013/02/how-to-be-fat-bitch-5-things.html
As to the discussion questions: I really do feel like being happy in the face of the enemy is the deepest and most awesome way to kick fatphobia in the ass. I'm so tired of regulating myself because I'm fat and because I don't fit in to a standard idea of beauty or femininity. Plus, when you're dancing to the tune of your own awesome band, the music's far too loud to hear any of the complaints. I'm tired of people passing judgement on me, and having to constantly worry and regulate myself so they feel good. I'm excited to uncover my inner fat-bitch! :)
Melissa
Rachele I have come to your blog thur Milky Robot and I just wanted to say how impressed I am with what you are doing. How fantastic is your course and I truly believe everyone needs to be empowered so they can be happy within themselves. I just watched your vlog and was quite shocked when you mentioned that you had to report your weight to your employer?? And that they charge you 'fat tax''. I am in Australia so I have never heard of that before? Why do they do that? Isnt that descrimination? Hope you don't mind me asking questions. Jenni
1. Go for a long walk in a park or a public space because part of fat acceptance for me is being seen, being visible.
2. Go on a date.
3. Use the word "fat" in a sentence in a way that is positive and affirming.
4. Make a home cooked meal.
5. Make a collage and finish writing letter to friend who lives far away.
How do you deal with people that make assumptions about you based on being fat? Is the best revenge to live well and be happy? How do you feel about the concept of there being a "good fatty" and a "bad fatty" perceived in society?
I learned at a very young age that laughter works best for me when dealing with other's assumptions about me, my fat, my body, and my fat body. As far as assumptions go I think I have come across as "comfortable" in terms of my fat body and I use this in the sense that often those who don't know me well assume that I will take this or that, that I will listen or be empathetic with this or that, that I will be patient with this or that. My fat body is not a pillow and I am not here to comfort any and everybody. In terms of being a "good fatty" or a "bad fatty" the very concept makes me crazy, particularly when those assumptions come into play. The very notion of this distinction in society is only a way to divide in a place where there could be support and solidarity.
Technically, it isn't discrimination because weight is not a protected class. It is for our medical insurance. If your BMI and waistline measurement is above a certain number you have to pay more in premiums and continue to report back as well as watch weight loss videos and considering joining Weight Watchers. This is now pretty common for US employers to do now - http://danceswithfat.wordpress.com/2012/10/19/charging-fat-people-more-for-health-insurance/ It is extremely problematic and discrimination! I wrote about it more here - http://www.nearsightedowl.com/2012/01/300-for-being-300-pounds.html
Your #3 is fantastic. This is actually something I am going to talk about next week!
I agree! I feel like people expect me to feel bad about myself and go into hiding or stop what I am doing. But really I just want to do more and wave my fat flag even more!
1. Start doing yoga regularly
2. Continue living a HAES lifestyle, and start intuitive eating
3. Get my kitchen organised so that when I want to bake & cook I don't get frustrated that I can't find anything!
4. Complete this e-course
5. Spend more time with my partner
YOU ARE AMAZING! My homework will be posted ASAP over at my page! I'm going to tell my readers all about it as well!
thatcortniegirl.com
LOVE this concept. You are so awesome.
I just read through that post about your employers health care stuff. there is so much wrong with that situation, I don't even know where to begin. I cannot believe that you have to tell them your waist measurement and now your weight. All bodies are different, they cannot tell someone what is healthy for them! Plus, why do men get 5 more inches? And what about people who are severely anorexic or bulimic? If they are going to judge fat people, they should judge skinny people too. they have just as many, if not more health risks. What the fuck, seriously?!
1. Try a new red lipstick
2. Swim more...when its not 20 degrees or less.
3. Do yoga again.
4. Get a better, less stressful job.
5. Bake a new recipe
:) Jenna
I never have people get in my face anymore, its mostly just cowardly snide people who make comments to their friends like little children, and people who seem to think they can say anything to people online just to be mean. But I had terriible insecurities when I was a teen and twenties, If I was then who I am now I would put people in their place! And I can relate to the good and bad fat girl ideas because I worked in hair salons for 16 years and it can be one of the most unhealthy, least accepting environments. everyone diets all the time, you cant cook anything and bring it in unless its a diet recipe. Well, I now say guck that, you are not worth cooking for then. im so glad I now have a group of diverse friends who love me as I am and celebrate their bodies and differences! Living well and being happy is the best revenge!
And Im so glad I found your blog!
Jenna
1. Move out of state & my comfort zone.
2. Stop comparing myself to women who are "acceptable sized fatties".
3. Travel!
4. Wear clothes that I like regardless of what other people might think.
5. Live life for me.
I think that this course is an amazing opportunity to look at topics I've never considered on my own. I'm going to post my discussion question on my blog and make sure to tag it.
My five:
- get more tattoos
- sing out loud more
- wear skirts
- kiss people more :)
- smile in photos
Discussion:
My mum has always controlled us girls' portion sizes and never offered us seconds like the boys... if I took more she wwould raise her eyebrows and ask if I REALLY needed that extra piece! And this was before I was even slightly chubby! Just because I was a girl! Ever since then I've apologized for eating more than others and feel greedy when I eat food I enjoy! Also I feel like my friends(who are all skinny and yet still on diets constantly) think I'm lazy and not trying to improve my life... people think nowadays that if you've had a baby and then don't work out obsessively and diet that you've given up. :( hoping that if I do all my homework then I won't hate what I see in the mirror anymore...
Seriously, you have no idea how much I need this right now! I am getting all over this like nutella on toast.
So, my 5 things....
1. Make, and blog a collage of sexy fat bitches I love (April Flores, anyone?)
2. Doll myself up and take photos of my new hair for my blog.
3. Shoot a new GodsGirls set. I've not shot one since I gained weight, so the GG community could be forgiven for thinking I'm a size 6, not a size 18. I need to stop hiding my body and get back into the alt porn I was once so passionate about. I was a model for years when I was skinny, even back then I was a fat-positivity activist, and constantly talking about how the world needs more visible fat women, but at the same time I was struggling with anorexia. I've talked the talk, now I need to walk the walk.
4. Look into moving to London. It's been a long-held ambition, and my health has stopped me. Need to work that one out.
5. Make some fat-positive patches. I have ideas, I just need to make them now! Sort it out, lazy me. Sort it out.
Oh boy. Now to try and force myself to actually *do* these instead of just thinking about them.
xx
1. practice my guitar-
2. take walks in the sunshine, rain, cold or warm... it helps me focus when im stressed by monstertoddlertime.
3. make an effort to put myself out there for photo shoots. even just for fun.
4. create more art.
5. dance! and not let the burlesque schemedream die!
Hi Rachele - I have just signed up for this ECourse - again, a truly brilliant idea! I have posted my assignment + my thoughts on the discussion topics under:
http://qarolinesqonundrums.blogspot.de/2013/02/fat-bitch-assignment-1.html
And this is my list of five:
#1: Finish sowing my short stripey dress to wear on Valentine's Day.
#2: Learn how to bake vegan cakes that don't taste like cardboard.
#3: Read more about self and fat acceptance.
#4: Finish writing my story about a fat teenage girl who does not hate herself for being fat.
#5: Planting herbs and vegetables in the garden and buying shedloads of tulips for my room.
Thank you so much for all of this! Love, Qaroline
My list http://annallusion.tumblr.com/post/42279703750/so-im-doing-this-shit
I've sort of given up arguing with people who feel the need to make assumptions about my health. "Aren't you worried about having a heart attack/getting the beetus/setting a bad example for your daughter health-wise?" "No *eats more pizza*" I don't think there's any one kind of "revenge" against people who make those assumptions, personally, I think too much time has been wasted trying to argue. So I just walk away.The idea of a moral value being attatched to my fat is something I bought into really heavily in my late teens/early 20's. I spent so much time and energy trying to fall into the "good" category and it breaks my heart to look back at that. It's such a ridiculous idea.
List:
1. Cut my hair!
2. Rejoin the gym (I really miss it, it did wonders for my stress,
though I probably wont be rejoing until like April... I don't like cold
early mornings...)
3. Make myself a scarf/hat/mitten set (I want to be warm and cute too!)
4. Wear my brightly coloured tights (that's one clothing style, I haven't been comfortable with)
5. Try to get a monthly group going with some other crocheters/crafters
Posted week 1 on my blog (http://www.yarrhooked.com/2013/02/htbafb-1.html)
Hey there, Rachele. This is one badass e-course. Thanks for making it free, too!! I am so excited!
Here's my post!: http://balancewithintention.blogspot.com/2013/02/f-t-i-t-c-h-k-n-e.html
Have an awesome day!
1. Take things like roller skating and playing at the park with my daughter off hold...because a person does not need to thin to play with their child.
2. Wear skirts this spring and summer. It gets frickin' hot in the Midwest and I shouldn't have to spend the warmer months in misery because others might find my chubby legs offensive.
3. Find a balance between being a hermit and drinking fat inhibitions away at bars...because absolutely no good can come from making out with random dudes
4. Wear makeup every single effin' day. It makes me feel pretty.
5. Buy clothes that I enjoy wearing rather than waiting until I can buy it in a smaller size.
My first thought when I read about fat acceptance was that it was an organized group of people who had given up and who were desperate to rationalize their failures. Iactually thought, "THAT is why I'm a better fat person...at least I want to make changes."
It is pretty crazy that sooo many people, including myself, are bothered by the thought of a fat person being truly content. I've day dreamed about being thin and the amazing changes that would take place if I were the size of my skinny sisters so many times and, looking back, all I've actually done is put my life and my happiness on hold. You're right. Fuck that. .and fuck anyone who has a problem with it...
Tina
I think you are lovely!! I wrote a post about this and will get my assignment done ASAP!! Let's do this!
http://www.enjoyingtheepiphany.com/2013/02/fat-bitch.html
Cool idea and I totally love the way you speak! So nice to listen to! I don't really fit into fat bitch category, but I'll love to watch your videos anyways. we can all use a bit of help with our body image from time to time. ;o)
5 Things To Do That Make Me Happy:
1. Exercise More (helps depression)
2. Buy More Shoes!
3. Stop Smoking (eventually I'll be happy with this one).
4. Read More!
5. Complete this course!
Question: How do you deal with people that make assumptions about you based on
being fat?
*They're not worth knowing
Is the best revenge to live well and be happy?
*Not necessarily out of revenge, more for yourself, but yes.
How do you
feel about the concept of there being a "good fatty" and a "bad fatty"
perceived in society?
*I think if you eat well and take care of yourself physically (in terms of getting exercise in order for your health), thats the most important part. We have to learn to separate ourselves and reality from media and society's perceptions. It's sort of living off the grid if we adjust our thinking.
Here's my link to my blog post: http://wp.me/p2xl72-v and my 5 are:
1. I want to take more pictures with my son, and in general. I'm always shying away from the camera, its time to stop that crap.
2. Wear more head bands, scarves, and other cute hair wear!
3. Start doing yoga again.
4. Make a new recipe every week (at least!).
5. Finish my knitting projects.
What a great idea! I'm so excited to be in on this. I'll be posting my assignments more fully on my blog (I think on Wednesdays). Here's my list:
1. Wear cute, colorful clothes. With stripes!
2. Buy a non-black bathing suit to wear this summer. And wear it!
3. Swim at the gym again, and sometimes just go for the hot tub.
4. Travel to New York to support my book at BEA, meet my editor, and not be afraid of all the people looking at me.
5. Learn to sew, from a pattern and to alter clothes.
1.practice HAES
2.Dance again!
3.wear more accessories
4.no apologies for being me
5.cook more often
1. Start zumba class
2. Wear my color conctact again cause I love them
3. Not going Ito listen to any negative opinion or comments
4. Be confident not only in the outside but also in the inside
5. Be more active.
1) More solo karaoke
2) Learn to take compliments
3) Finish all the short stories and essays I have started
4) Sleep more
5) Meditation + worry management
I am so freaking excited about this course :D
My top five of a list I wrote when I saw this assignment..
1. bake once a week and restart my baking blog
2. continue to practice HAES/intuitive eating ONE day at a time
3. go for walks and rides when I want to (only because I want to)
4. keep learning and practicing pin up hair/makeup
5. wear clothes I feel great in (even if it shows that I have a fat belly)
Okay, as for your discussion questions..
How do you deal with people that make assumptions about you based on being fat? Is the best revenge to live well and be happy? How do you feel about the concept of there being a "good fatty" and a "bad fatty" perceived in society?
I still find that I get defensive inside my head about people possibly making assumptions about me because I'm fat. So I am often challenging these defensive reactions internally, reminding myself that I owe others nothing, not being healthy not exercising, not being a 'good fatty', nothing.
thing is, I know as a smaller fat woman (AUS 16-18) I experience a lot of privilege compared to fatter people, so I haven't had much of the name-calling etc. But I've internalised a lot of the shame, and so am still learning to challenge all that. I am surrounded by people dieting and my family praising them (incl. my sister and sister in law), and need to remind myself that just because I'm being a 'bad fatty', that doesnt mean I'm a less than worthy person, it just means that I'm putting myself first. I totally agree that there are good/bad fatty concepts - as long as you're trying to 'do something about it', then you're more acceptable as a fatty, there is a lot more judgement about fatties who are perceived to have 'given up' as someone else commented earlier.
I do agree that the best revenge is to live well and happy - whatever that may be for you. I love that there are so many variants of that in the comments already. there is no one version. And for me - living well means being a "bad fatty" and saying i am going to put my own wellbeing FIRST - I am not going to buy into the shame that others like for us to feel just for being fat. fuck that.
Unsure if any of that made sense.. oh well ;)
I'm pretty far along the FA/HAES road so I don't have too much to say right now, except the answer to this question: Is the best revenge to live well and be happy?" is YES.
Here's my collage! http://little-supernova.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/racheles-how-to-be-fat-bitch-e-course.html Pretty happy with it, if I say so myself ;D
xx
I was looking forward to this but as a woman who
doesn't like being called sexist slurs, i'm gonna have to pass :( And spare me that third wave bullshit about "reclaiming" it.
sexist slurs cannot be reclaimed by women because they aren't our words in the first place.
I appreciate your feedback. It is a touchy word! It changed in the 60's to a word also used by women in feminist terms with The BITCH Manifesto - "Our society has defined humanity as male, and female as something other than male. In this way, females could be human only by living vicariously thru a male. To be able to live, a woman has to agree to serve, honor, and obey a man and what she gets in exchange is at best a shadow life. Bitches refuse to serve, honor or obey anyone. They demand to be fully functioning human beings, not just shadows. They want to be both female and human."
And then in the 90's with BITCH Magazine - "When we chose the name, we were thinking, well, it would be great to reclaim the word “bitch” for strong, outspoken women, much the same way that “queer” has been reclaimed by the gay community. That was very much on our minds, the positive power of language reclamation."
(http://clarebayley.com/2011/06/bitch-a-history/)
The word has been redefined and in the context that I am using it, isn't an insult. I chose it because it shouts all those things - feminist, out-spoken, opinionated, strong - with just one word and is familiar since being used by BITCH Magazine. I want to convey the opposite of "bitch" as an insult. That this is an ecourse for challenging societal norms and loving our bodies and feeling fierce - for ourselves and not a man or corporations, etc.
Sorry for the rant! I felt like I could elaborate more on the subject and maybe open up the discussion for other people too.
I think so too! I don't think we should go out of our way to demonstrate our happiness or prove anything, such as people wanting to know everything I eat or my activity levels so they can justify my existence as a fat woman. I refuse to do that but I think the best way to say "screw you" is to be a badass fat bitch :)
5 things for myself that will make me happy:
1) make brownies because I've been craving them and I'm not going to feel guilty for eating them
2) flirt shamelessly with my boyfriend (who happens to love and crave my awesome curves)
3) go to my Zumba class because I was born to dance
4) throw myself into my role in the love scene I was assigned in my acting class because it will be an awesome opportunity
5) give myself a hug
Discussion: It is frustrating when people make assumptions about me but I usually go for the "live well" option because I don't have the time or patience to try and explain to them how messed up their thinking is. I got a "good fatty"-type compliment from an employee at a gym I was at: I just smiled and rolled my eyes. I am a licensed Zumba instructor who has been told I am an "inspiration." But often the next question is "how much weight have you lost?" *SIGH* I haven't lost any weight, I've gained stamina, strength and energy. No one should be judged for what they eat or what they do or don't do with their bodies. Everyone has to make their own choices. I resent the fact that behaviors that label one a "bad fatty" are acceptable in a thin person. The idea that we must conform to other people's expectations of health and/or physical appearance is ridiculous.
Just like "fat"! So many people try to use it as an insult and here we are, reclaiming the word!! :)
1. Take a nap
2. Walk my dog every morning - I really like the alone time and the fresh (albeit very chilly) air
3. Post about this course on my blog
4. Go to dinner with friends
5. Eat a glazed donut.
Since Friday, I've done #1, #2, #4, and I just finished #3. I am planning #5 before work today!
I'm a bit late in posting my list, but that's okay because it means I've actually gone ahead and done some of these things already!
1) Make a public facebook post about my support of size acceptance. (Did it, with mostly positive results! I got one commenter who wasn't supportive but it didn't even bother me as much as I thought it would.)
2) Go to the dog park every day this week while the sun is out with my beloved doggie. (So far so good.)
3) Make something artsy to flex my creative muscles.
4) Reach out to some girls I've been meaning to get to know better. Ask them for coffee and see if I can't make some new friends.
5) This one is more of a risk, and I can't guarantee that I'll find it fun, but I wanted to put one item on the list that would challenge me (besides item 1, which I already did.) Anyway, it's to take a full body photograph of myself and post it online.
So excited about signing up for this ecourse. I'm always striving to be more confident and happier in myself, so I think this course is going to be a beautiful thing for me.
My list:
1. Walk in the park with my hubby just to enjoy the city and being outside
2. Journal my feelings honestly (aka, be more honest with myself)
3. Wear a slamming dress to a wedding this weekend with NO Spanx!
4. Bake a treat I've saved on Pinterest and share with my family
5. Try a different hairstyle- maybe a dye job?
Thanks for doing this amazing course, I look forward to learning so much and being a part of such a great community of women!
Made sense to me! I feel like I have some level of privilege also because I don't get that negative reaction in public or face to face but it does happen online occasionally. But I also feel like if I were in my pajamas and unbrushed hair that I would get a different reaction. As far as family and coworkers, I have gotten really good at tuning them out and they don't bother anymore. I feel like there is a social experiment in somewhere in there.
Hi , Im Jennafer. I seem to have a lot of trouble posting here. I keep trying"...
Anyway my five are 1 wear a new red lipstick, 2 start doing yoga again, 3 swim more (when its not freezing this is easier). 4 make a new baking recipe, 5 finish my degree and get a better job, quitting my horrible one.
Since this isnt typing well, Im just going to abbreviate what I tried to say before and say that living well and being happy is the best.Working in hair salons has beeen the worst for my self esteem"people on group diets.fuck that.
You should check out "Vegan Cupcakes take over the world" by Isa Chandra Moskowitz and Terry Hope Romero. Their recipes are AWSOME! There's also "The Joy of Vegan Baking" by Colleen Patrick-Goudreau, which has all kinds of savory and sweet recipes, including one for amazing lemon bars! Hope this helps,
Allie
I'm super excited about this!! My happy things are on my blog
http://connoisseurofhumanfolly.wordpress.com/2013/02/05/5-happy-things/
I *really* appreciate all the thought and effort that you have put into this e-course, Rachele. It is certainly giving me things to think about during the process of my day. I'd like to respond to your first assignment. Here are my five things that would very much improve my life:
1. Get re-connected with my (new) local flat-track-roller-derby team. I've found that derby attracts girls of all sizes and abilities and I love to quad roller-skate. On my to-do list for tomorrow, it will be a must to contact the recruiter and the NSO (Non-Skating-Officials) to see how I can at least help out (volunteering) and working out with the team. Those girls make me happy, happy, happy!! :0))
2. Stop procrastinating with my blog. I live in a very vivid city with plenty of things to do, yet I tend to spend a lot of time by myself. You know, dreaming instead of DOING.
3. I'm a very social person, but after moving three times (Germany - Shreveport - New Orleans) all in the space of 10 months, I just haven't seemed to have any energy. I need to get back in touch with real, live, people... and not stay on the internet with friends who are (literally) thousands of miles away. Basically, it's time to get out of my comfort zone and make contact with others.
4. Up my efforts at finding a jobby-job. A real-life job. Part time, at least. But I want to find something that will enrich my life and my passions. So, I'd like to put in at least one application a day - and what I'd love to get into is the food industry as a prep chef/sous chef. Cooking is my thing.
5. Stop thinking of myself as fugly. I'm not a typical "beauty" and I know that I am very charismatic - but I need to work on accepting myself and all my curves and quirks. The only time I really have issues with my fatty self is when I go clothes shopping, because it depresses me that I haven't quite found my style (or ways to try and disguise my fat).
To the second part of the assignment:
I don't give a flying fuck about what people think of me. I've always marched to the beat of my own drummer. I'm not an aggressive person, but I'm not going to put up with someone making snarky or nasty comments about me, either. Like many others have posted, I find the people who attempt to put me down have some serious self-esteem issues... especially those who think that being "skinny" is the end-all-and-be-all of life. To me, those types of people are to be pitied - they *really* don't know any better, and I'm willing to bet that their IQ is lower than 95. It's sad when all they can say is "You're fatter than me". Whoop-de-doo. These type of folks ALWAYS come across as idiots and all I can do is hope they don't breed.
I'm used to a crap-ton of bullshit. I'm child-free-by-choice and atheist (married for 10 years to a smokin' hot military man) - so I'm pretty used to being treated very differently.
Hi, I'm Mindy, and this is my blog mindybethke.blogspot.com. Here are my 5.
1. I am going to wear what I want... No matter if the 'experts' say I shouldn't because I'm not the right shape, or I shouldn't wear that color because it makes me show my 'problem' areas. Because honestly I love color, and I want to wear it. I want to feel good wearing pink, or red, or yellow. I will rock those colors no matter what size I am.
2. I am going to take my art downtown for the art walk. I have a HUGE fear of rejections. And my art is me, it's myself on a canvas, it's who I am, I'm really scared to show people that, because what if they don't like me. The worse anybody can say is 'No'. So, after I'm finished with a few pieces I'm working on I'm taking them downtown. I'm going to show them my talent, and if they put it in their store that's great, if they don't it's not like the world will end!
3. I am going to kiss my husband in public more. PDA has always been a problem. I always feel like if I kiss him somebody is going to say something rude about my weight. My husband is the most awesome man, ever. He truly loves me for who I am, he's the only person in my life who has never seen me as the 'fat girl'. That fact that I'm fat doesn't matter to him. I'm so amazed by how attracted he is to me.
4. I am going to rock out in my car. Lately in Washington we have been having good weather. It's been in the lower 50's, which is kind of warmish. I'm going to open my sunroof and blast my Courtney Love CDs. I drive a cute lemon-green Beetle, and I think.. actually I know I look cute driving it, so if people want to watch me rock out it won't bother me!
5. I'm going to wear lipstick everyday. Even If I don't go anywhere. I'm a lipstick addict, and it makes me happy!
I shot *two* sets of GodsGirls, and posted piccies of my new hair. http://little-supernova.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/new-hair.html
Dang, Rachele, you are good for my productivity!
xx
Here's my post for our first assignment!! http://secretagentinmyownmind.blogspot.com/2013/02/de-lurking.html
And thank you for putting this together. It's already helped me so much.
Really excited about this course!
Here are my five things -
1. Eat something that I would normally feel guilt for eating because it's not 'healthy' and focus on enjoying it mindfully, rather than feeling shitty for eating something delicious.
2. Read a book and have a cup of tea.
3. Do yoga!
4. Get over my fear of exercising in public. Go for walks!
5. Spend time with friends.
I've just posted my homework up on my blog (http://www.bigfatbetty.com/2013/02/how-to-be-fat-bitch-1.html) and linked back with the badge :) but I'll copy it here too...
1) Don't be afraid of dating (I've been thinking about signing up to a site again) - even though I've had pretty horrific experiences with men in the past, statistically
they can't all be morons.
2) Get down the charity shops and start knitting - this was one of my January 'new hobby' ideas and I haven't started yet. Plus this doesn't involve people judging me (unlike singing), bonus.
3) Stop being a lazy mare, get up in the mornings and make myself LOOK and FEEL good. I feel so much more positive when I make an effort with my appearance.
4) Carry on blogging. I enjoy it so much and yet I rarely bother to write anything.
5) Do more modelling, particularly clothed modelling. I've already enquired about a test shoot with Models of Diversity so this one is already in the bag...or at least a little bit.
To be blunt, it aggrovates me that people make assumptions about me full stop. My weight, mental health, sexuality, etc, is none of their business unless I choose to make it so. None of my health problems are weight related - in fact I can't get treated for some of my health problems because my GP makes the assumption that everything is caused by my weight.
Is the best revenge to live well and be happy? Yes, but I'd like to point out that this does not mean going on a diet (or diets really, considering I don't know a single person who has been on ONE diet, lost weight and not put that weight back on - not a criticism...well it is, of diets, not of people). To me, revenge is pretty much saying...fuck you. Fuck you, your narrow minded view of the world and ideas of conformity. I am fat, happy and proud! (Sorry about the swearing, but it kinda loses impact if I change itto a word like 'sod'...though I'd like to tell them to sod off, too!)
My five things
-Sew myself some skirts
-buy a dress that I love wearing
-figure out how to be happy in spite of my job or get a different one
-go on walks regularly with my husband and the dogs, I spend most of my life in a cubicle, the outside is a good thing!
-give myself a break!
Honestly the only direct fat shaming I get is from myself, thank you for this ecourse, I would never think to fat shame anyone else and yet I do it to myself. I am Rachele's twin, bright red hair, tattoos, piercings, cat eye glasses, vintage cardigans and a cat that looks so much like Marie (mine is Chairman Meow). I tend to get a fair amount of positive attention about the way I look, but I work in a predominately female environment and listen to a lot of self fat shaming and diet talk and "oo you look like you lost weight keep it up and you will be skinny," and eat lunch occasionally with women who while bragging about how they are eating a half a cup of low fat cottage cheese, a rice cake and carrots for lunch talk about how they will be happy when they lose x amount or they can go on vacation once they are this size. The other day I said to one of them " I think you are a beautiful and awesome person and it makes me so sad that you don't see that." It was a cool moment.
ps- Shaunta who is going to BEA for her book, What is your book? I am a collection development librarian who buys books for a library system and would love to hear about it.
thanks Rachele this is an awesome thing you are doing!
My homework!: http://lateshoes.com/2013/02/fat-bitch-week-1/
Rachele, thanks so much for putting this together!
-Tracy
5 things:
1. Start taking those free yoga classes at the yoga studio / clown school. I'm scared of: farting in public, of not being flexible enough to do yoga at all and of clowns. Sooooooo, this goal is going to make me happy on many levels including knowing I have the strength to face my fears.
2. Stop shaving. I hate shaving but I've done it for so many years now because I've felt like I wasn't woman enough for my southern culture...why add one more? Well, no longer. I'm tattooed, razor free and on a mission to be the best person I can be.
3. Hiking part of the Appalachian Trail in March with friends. I can't wait!
4. More sexy times with my hubby. 'Nuff said.
5. Learn to play the saw.
Jennifer
Grits And Moxie
To be honest, as a smaller fat lady I haven't gotten a great deal of negative reactions. I'm sure this is also influenced by the fact that I have an anxiety disorder and am an introvert. I don't step out and do a lot of things that would make me a 'bad fatty'. But when I do receive negative reactions for my size, I of course, tend to argue. I don't think people understand how fallacious the idea that 'thin = healthy' is.
I think it's quite ridiculous that fat people are forced or expected to act in only certain ways, one of which is having an attitude of self-loathing. Everyone should be able to love themselves. No one should be expected to hate themselves to be 'acceptable'.
Got off to a late start, but here are my 5!
1. I'm going to say hi to a random stranger. Why not spread my awesomness around?? :)
2. I'm going to have seconds at dinner and not give a flying fig of what people are thinking!
3. I'm going to wear a pair of my wedge heels sometime this week...just for the hell of it. And because they make me feel sexy ;)
4. I'm going to give myself a fabulous pedicure!
5. I'm going to compliment myself, and not wait for someone else to.
For my full Assignment: http://lovecatliz.blogspot.com/2013/02/htbafb-e-course-1.html
Rachele, thank you for being such an inspiration and for providing this course for free. You are doing amazing work!
1) Dye my hair!
2) Go buy some new clothes. Just because I’m fat doesn’t mean I don’t deserve things that fit and that I like
3) Get rid of those clothes that are too small that people tell me I should hold on
for ‘motivation to lose weight’. It’s degrading and I don’t deserve being
guilted for being fat every time I get dressed.
4) Buy all those geeky things I want, like Captain America themed shoes. I don’t have
to prove I’m a responsible adult and good mother ‘despite my weight’.
5) Finally get my nose pierced.
5 Things
1. Take a self-defense class
2. Get some badass tattoos
3. Wear summer clothes in summer.
4. Swim
5. Go SHOPPING!!!!
The only assumptions I've noticed (there are probably others I fail to notice) is that I'm assumed to be bulimic rather than anorexic.
Though in my lose weight phases people go from " Well done!' to ' Whats wrong?!' really quick, like there is some sort of magical cut off point where you go from 'Fat is BAD!!!' to 'A Bit Fatter would be BETTER!!'
Society hates/mistrusts fat people whether 'good' or 'bad', you simply make society feel better about itself if you are perceived as a 'good fatty'.
1. Be more positive.
2. Rock a swimsuit.
3. Get more sleep.
4.Love myself.
5. Read more.
Society expects fat people to explain why they are fat. I'm tired of people inquiring into what I eat and how active I am. I'm tired of hearing things like, "I don't usually eat like this." and "It might not look like it, but I eat really well." I love who I am, and I don't have to explain what I do.
You are the most gorgeous, inspirational, hilarious and sweet lady ever! Thank you so much for providing this E-course! I'm a little late to the party but I will be posting my work this week! Ha, I love your accent, awesome! <3 Thank you lovely lady!
http://emilymaryloves.blogspot.co.uk/
Hello! I singed up. I wrote a little something in the heat of the moment. I hope this is a great community e-course.
zuleyb.blogspot.com
Hello gorgeous plumpette!
I don't think I can express through this ethernet separation how thankful I am that you exist and are brave enough to be a pioneer of this movement that has shaken the foundations of what I believed other people thought about their bodies. Until recently, I didn't know that there were fat women out there who were so happy with themselves, wore bathing suits, ate more healthfully than most 'average' sized people I know, and who would just smile and throw up a middle finger to anyone who didn't see them for the goddess they are. I'm starting to hate myself a little less every time I read an article from your blog or follow another happy fatty on tumblr.
So, again, thank you. I'm done now :D
1. Stop binge eating. I eat like I'm going to college for it, especially when I'm stressed out. I generally feel bloated, depressed, and like a hot-air balloon. It's not sexy, and definitely not good for my mental health. I'm in therapy, so I'll definitely bring up that I need to stop relying on food for my happiness (and maybe once I allow myself to do more things, it'll be easy).
2. Go to the goddamned gym already. My university has the nicest fitness center you've ever seen, but I don't go. Because I'm fat. And everyone will judge me. Except they probably won't, but if they do...the world isn't going to end. I'm sure people judge me all day and I have no idea--or maybe they don't--the point is, I think that I have stigmatized the gym in my head so much that I forgot to really think about how bad it might not be.
3. Stop enviously staring at tattoos because "I'm too fat to have a tattoo!" (seriously, where did I even get that from?)
4. Stop sucking it in and rearranging my shirt every five seconds to prevent any VBO. I have a pooch and no matter how uncomfortable I make myself with these perfunctory contortions, I'm not gonna look any different--and why the fuck should I want to?
5. Not walking away from an awesome flirt-a-thon and thinking, "He was just being nice--he's too hot to date a fatty," or seeing a guy look at me and thinking "Nope, he wasn't checking me out! I'm fat for Christ's sake!"
I am just getting going with this and having a blast looking through everyone else's assignments too! Mine is here: http://www.musewrites.com/bloghome/archives/1455
A little late, but better than never, right?
My post can be found here: http://adipossible.tumblr.com/post/45560947347/how-to-be-a-fat-bitch-week-one-i-signed-up
I'll go ahead and post my list here too though.
1. Get a tattoo.
2. Dye at least part of my hair a fun color!
3. Go back to school
4. Wear make-up more, because I like makeup.
5. Sign up for a dating site... or three.
I've already done #5, and I have plans for the rest of them in the upcoming months. Why shouldn't I do stuff to make me happy?
1.Get more tattoos
2.Make a skirt in comic strip fabric
3.Start wearing heels again.
4.Go to a club
5.Have a rocking 56th Birthday party!
I went to buy a second hand vintage ring.The shop assistant looked at me and said she doubted it would fit my fingers! I insisted she show it to me,and it fit me perfectly.Damn idiot assumed I had sausage fingers or something because I'm fat,when in fact they are quite slender and long.
I love #2 and #4--I went to a club last weekend for an AIDS event and rocked to 80's new wave/alternative all night!
xo~Jennafer aka whitejenna
1. Eat when i'm hungry and stop being afraid of having "one more cookie"
2. STOP HIDING. Wear clothes even if they show my rolls and don't "flatter me"
3. Accept that dieting really. doesn't. work. and that you can be healthy and fat
4. Find a yoga class
5. Enjoy this summer and rock a bathing suit
!!!! Thanks so much for this awesome course! <3
I'm coming to this pretty late, but here's my blog post on the first week assignment: http://katjevanloon.com/5-things-ill-do-thatll-make-me-happy/
This is a really awesome ecourse. I'm finding that it's ripping away some deeply-ingrained fat hate I hadn't even realized I had. Thank you, Rachele, for doing this.
I've done mine http://seeingsp0ts.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/how-to-be-fat-bitch-1.html
Just registered and can't wait to start to do this.
1. Walk more
2. Incorporate more color into my wardrobe and not just wear black to try and hide my fat
3.Try and flirt with a guy
4. Get more tattoos
5. Laugh more
I'm joining in late- thank you for such a great idea. I'm looking forward to catching up. :-) I posted my liston my blog here: http://ccurves.blogspot.com.au/2013/03/fat-bitch-e-course-week-1.html
And I'll write it here too:
1. Paint my nails
2. Play my guitar
3. Play Just Dance on the Wii more often
4. Have a try at making a skirt
5. Dye my hair more often
Just joined the ecourse. http://bit.ly/107J4Hc
What makes me happy?
- playing around with my dog
- backing cupcakes with my nice
- a hot bubblebath after a stressful day
- crafting tiny (glittering) things
- singing out loud when nobody can hear me
xoxo
Super late to this, but here goes:
1. Enjoy being with my kids at the park
2. Get more color in my wardrobe. I have too much black and brown, I want to wear the fun spring colors and feel bright and sunny!
3. Toss all of my "I may fit in these again someday" clothes.
4. Go thrifting and get some fun vintage yumminess to make my house a home.
5. Make myself some dresses and skirts. I am tired of covering up my legs and arms because it isn't the "norm" while making myself hot and uncomfortable. I am going to get some fun, bright, feminine fabrics and make something that makes me feel good!
You are super cute, i think you have great ideas! Im even tattooing my arm this week instead of covering up!
1. go to that donation-based yoga class because i like movement, dammit!
2. join a meditation circle so i can be more present, centered, and mindful
3. learn to sew more stuffs because i like creating
4. be in nature more - it revitalizes me
5. go on a swing - how much fun is swinging?!
I needed to find this right now. So here are my five things:
1) Tell myself every day one thing I love about myself physically
2) Be active! (Play just dance with my kids or walk to the book store)
3) Be a better friend
4) Play video games and read books! (Happiness!)
5) Don't freak out over food!
I am so a late comer to this party...But I needed it!
Ohhh...so that's what that arrow does! HA!
My five things as follows:
-Stop the dieting. Stop. Tori just throw away the diet books, throw away the quick fixes, throw away the temptation to only drink coffee, or only eat salads, or whatever food bullshit. Eat when hungry. Eat yummy healthy foods. Stop when you're full. Just eat.
-Sex. Enjoy it. I have a partner that loves me and cares for me. Stop thinking about how tought it must be or how 'ugly' you are. Sex. Enjoy it. Go sex your partners brains out.
-Run. You know you love it girl. Stop thinking about your skort riding up and showing your 'fat' ass. They should be jealous to see such a hot ass in motion.
-Laugh. Let yourself be you, even if that means dancing at the bus-stop or skipping down the street. Laugh when things make you happy and seek out FUN things. You live in a great big city full of good stuff. Enjoy it!
-Take some fashion and clothing risks when you can. You did a good job buying that hot new sweater mom sad looked ogood on you. Now dye that mop of hair you've been wanting to dye forever. Buy clothes that fit and feel good that work with your style. Be you deary.
-
I DID IT!
I registered.
I pushed that button.
Sent it.
I've been debating this for months and months.
I've LOVED this blog since the first day I saw Rachele's bikini photo and had to know who that awesome girl was.
I think I want the structure of this as a bit of support at the moment :)
I've hand written my list of 5 things. I've done it on a small piece of paper and dated it so I can keep it in my purse with me as a reminder.
My list is;
1. Get a new tattoo.
I have this on the way to being done! I'm booked in for the 5th July.
2. Cosplay.
I love comics and comicons and all the like, I'd love to be brave enough to dress up for one.
3. Stop diet talk with colleagues and customers.
I waitress and I'm so bad for 'Oooh, no dessert? Aren't you being good!' or joking about the calories falling out of food when it's cut etc. It's easier to chit chat this way, but it's not healthy for me OR them!
4. Screw tights this summer.
I do this every year, I get hot, uncomfortable and sweaty. What is the point?!
5. Join a craft club/class.
I know that once a month there is a knitting class right down the road from me but it's trying to be brave enough to go, eeek!
I think it's a small list, but it's something I can accomplish.
All totally doable :)
Wishing everyone luck with their own lists! x
Here's my list http://blog.mummybrain.com/2013/05/how-to-be-a-fat-bitch.html this is great! Really looking forward to be involved!
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I think I registered, now I'm second guessing myself. :P I better double check my spam box in my email to see if I missed an e-mail. Nevertheless! I have a list now. :D
1. Go swimming more - preferably once a week because swimming is win.
2. Get up a little earlier so I can play with more fun makeup
3. Try out new recipes for baking and cooking
4. Go back to bellydancing (eventually)
5. Sing more and sing often! :D
Discussion - well, let's be honest there's no such thing as a good fatty and a bad fatty. There's a war on obesity and fatties are the enemy! Even if you try to be a 'good fatty' and struggle towards thinness as the holy grail, you're still not going to make it there. It's just not how bodies work - or how societies work. It still drives me nuts when people say they 'feel fat' because they ate a lot of food. I need to look into why that bothers me. I know for sure I still have issues with the word 'fat' - reclaiming it is going to be a longer journey for me. But seriously, if you eat a poutine, you're not fat. You might be full, maybe overfull, but that is not the same as fat. Eff off. If you're so whiny about it, give ME the poutine. I will happily enjoy it for you. :P
My list..
1 Get a tattoo
2 Wear clothes I like instead of what hides me
3 Grow my hair
4 Go to the gym or at least be outside more
5 Relax my overworked mind
Discussion...
I don't know how to deal with people who judge me as I still am working on accepting myself. Given time and more confidence I doubt it will bother me.
Thank you so much for creating this, I think you truly inspire a great lot of people!
Excellent satire here. I almost thought this was real! "Fat Bitch eBook", classic!
This is real. I am not being cheeky! Also, it is an ECOURSE, but an EBOOK may be in the works eventually.
Thanks so much for doing this.
1) Plan more walks
2) See more live comedy
3) cook better nutritious food for myself not diet food
4) start running again - I loved the power of it
5) keep myself busy and out in the world instead of shutting myself away.
Discussion - I'm probably on the smaller end of the fat spectrum so I can't say thst I have received negativity from people day to day. I think it's the insidious fat hate that has damaged me and I never even realised. The media and culture has made me hate my fat body and because a womans worth is equated to how you look I have felt worthless for a very long time. I've started to try and combat this thinking in my mind and it's blogs like this that are helping me get on good terms with myself and treat myself with compassion.
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